Insert BS Chevy truck style commercial (clears throat and speaks like the Marlboro Man):
"They say men are getting soft. It seems these young fellas care more about the way their hair looks and the car they drive than they care about how they fill out their trousers.
There ain’t no more (guitar begins to play and he speaks faster) fast runners, do-it-yourselfers, protectors of the downtrodden-ers, and manly manners. Nahhhh (guitar stops and speaks slowly) in the age of weak men, stand atop them, and wear...Banana Republic Jeans.”
You can tell from the stupid grin on my face that this commercial goes through my head every time I pass someone on a trail and they get to look at my filled out jeans. - 41 minutes ago