So I'm not really sure where to start with this post tbh, as it's not something I'm usually comfortable speaking about but here goes...There aren't a lot of people that know this about me, but in 2012 I was diagnosed with severe Anorexia Nervosa. The picture on the left came up today on my memories from 23/02/2013. At this point in time things took a dramatic turn for the worse. I starved myself for almost weeks at a time, had massive amounts of time off school because I was physically and mentally too weak to function most days, or I'd be first to catch a bug or any virus going round because my immune system was ridiculous, or I'd be in and out of hospital. 2012-Early 2013 was a very very dark time in my life, I wasn't dealing with anything and I shut everybody out, family, friends, lying to therapists, anything I could do to put on a front and act like everything was alright when it quite obviously wasn't.
Then my world came crashing down once I realised just how bad things had gotten, being told face to face by a doctor that if things carried on progressing as rapidly as they were I'd be facing some serious health complications...that could escelate into fatality. That absolutely killed me and weighed down on me like a ton of bricks. I couldn't put my family through that so I knew I had to get better for their sake and of course for myself. It was never an easy journey and it still isn't, I'm not going to sit here and lie and say things changed over night because they definitely didn't, it took relapse after relapse and countless amounts of counselling sessions, dietition appointments, weigh ins and doctors appointments but here we are 6 years later. In that time I fell in love with taking care of my body, learned how to exersise without it becoming exessive, learned how to eat again and it staying continuous rather than binging and starting back at square 1. Now I absolutely love the gym and love my food and I'm competing in September. I have an amazing support system around me and incredible people in my life that I'm greatful and thankful for every single fucking day. I'm not and never will be ashamed of my past, it's made me who I am today - 1 hour ago