🛤 The matrix game of Polarity.
Been spending a lot of time in my home town lately. Took me 20 years to go back. But the universe “accidentally” brought me there last year. At first there was a lot of tears and releasing. And now not only is a new, more integrated story emerging, it’s one of my favorite cities in California. I am starting to experience how we don’t erase the traumas of our past, we don’t deny or pretend it didn’t happen, we integrate it- we allow it to merge into our hearts and we receive the wisdom and expansion it always held for us, while we let go of having to keep reliving the pain and suffering and old programming it once held.
I grew up always feeling like I was existing on the wrong side train tracks- Never feeling quite like I fit in. Duality was always a gleaming reflection of what I wasn’t in all directions around me....the town I lived in, the school I went to, the clothes I wore, the shape of my body, etc... We live in a world of polarity. Yes-no, right-wrong, beautiful-ugly, fat-thin, poor-rich, success-failure, good-bad, etc. All of these parts of a limiting matrix box that make no sense because love encompasses more than a box of labels and paradigms.
But I didn’t know I was love- I had forgot, and so had most the people around me. I didn’t know my worth wasn’t based on which side of the box I stood, which side of the tracks I lived, or how I looked on the outside. I didn’t know I was soooo more than the stupid box or the stupid train tracks! And as a result I turned a lot of that anger, sadness, and frustration inwards.
We are programmed to resist who we are, and chase a never ending loop of trying be something different- something better, something prettier, something younger, something more successful- leading us further away from what is already here for us right now. This is a deep program of separation to others, and separation to the truth of who we are as an aspect of Source.
All of these sides of outer appearances- all of these sides we try to fit into so we can can feel apart of, loved, seen, valued, connected. (Continued below) - 2 days ago