I’m at a place in my life where I look way better on paper than I do in reality but I’m the happiest I’ve ever been. Biggest lesson I’ve ever learned: everything I NEED already exists within me and nothing externally can give me what I can give me.
From the outside looking in things always seem far more put together than they actually are.
If I were to tell you I’m living off of $12k/year ( if that) right now would you believe me? In this moment I can say I don’t have a home of my own that I own, I don’t drive my dream car ( not even sure what it would be anyway) I don’t have a steady ‘job’, I don’t have a 401k, I don’t have the fun money I’m used to having, far from the white picket fence and family of my own... according to society I’m living a below average lifestyle and should probably be miserable or anxious over all of the things I don’t quite have yet or regret the things I have given up to be where I am today... the cushy job the great benefits... the “just good enough” life.
What I do have- work ethic, ambition, ideas, love, support, trust in myself and my goals, roof over my head, money to pay my bills and stay afloat and food in my belly. Am I living like Oprah? Not yet. Will I be someday? Fuck yes and I won’t stop until I do... So often we want to fast forward straight to the destination forgetting that the beauty lies in the process. It’s through these times I’m living through right now where resiliency is tested, hope and trust become necessities, and consistency is key..... I may not have it all figured out but I’m the happiest I’ve ever been and I have the “least” according to tangible items and additional resources. The things that get me through each day at this point are intangible they can’t be touched or seen but they drive me, inspire me and keep me going when I’m feeling less than adequate as I climb this mountain with no peak in sight... - 9 months ago